Bartenders are a special breed, a nitty-gritty, blunt, funny, crude and entertaining breed! They will smile your way, insult you and make you like it, put up with your bullshit but also lend a compassionate ear when necessary, get you drunk as hell while every so often telling you to get the fuck away from them because you crossed a line they may or may not have let you in on. There are many types of bartenders but they all have one thing in common, they are not your servant! They will serve you; most of the time with a smile, try to accommodate your whims and give you recommendations but do not think for one second they are your bitch and you get to treat them as such.
I was once told there are four people you should never fuck with: your mother, your lawyer, your drug dealer and your bartender! God forbid any one person be more than one of those things to you because if my mom was my bartender she would have way too much credit when cutting me off.
After many years on both sides of the bar in many different environments, there are just so many stories, tips and rants that need to be shared; hence this blog. This is your one warning: if you are overly sensitive, can’t take a joke or a self-entitled douche please click the X on the top right side of your screen immediately because if you keep reading you may fall subject to a few side effects including (but not limited to) anger, crying, randomly yelling out that I’m rude, wanting to kick my ass and worst of all you might just realize you are that guy or gal when you are out in public and want to change your ways! If you do not fall into one of those categories: read on, have fun, get annoyed and take it all with a grain of salt, some lime and maybe a couple of shots of tequila.
The Sassy Bartender 